Coming home from practice

The place where I go to practice is not very far from where I live; probably about a 10 minute walk. Tonight on my way home while walking down one of the streets, all of the streetlights on that street went out. It got very dark all at once and felt very freaky. I guess I felt a little secure in the fact that I was in a small town, not that nothing ever happens here, just less of it, I suppose.

It got me thinking of when I lived in Montreal and how often I had moments where I was scared because I was either being followed by some jerk that thought being a smartass would get him somewhere or being constantly stared at while doing my wash at the laundramat. I don't know where some men got the impression that walking 10 paces behind you while you are scared out of your wits or following beside you in a car would make him attractive to any female, let alone me.

I've had a few incidents that were especially scary to me. One was when I worked for a jewellery company that was on the 6h floor. Since the company actually manufactured the jewellery (there was always alot of gold, diamonds, precious stones and of course cash) you had to enter one door, then be buzzed in through the second.. and again buzzed in through the third.

I remember it was winter and I was going down the long corridor toward our entrance and I could see a guy walking in a weird manner in front of me. He was wearing dark clothing, a dark tuque and he was swaying side to side as he advanced down the corridor. At first I thought perhaps he was handicapped because he wasn't walking at a normal pace.. until he turned to face me. He had his manhood in his hand (it was limp, by the way) and shaking it back and forth.

I had always heard this type of pervert was basically really harmless and that they enjoyed exposing themselves but that they never actually did anything. Well, this one did.. he lunged at me and grabbed my breasts.. Of course, I screamed and pushed him off of me. He ran. I ran to our entrance .. got in between the first 2 doors but had to be buzzed in through the next 2 before being able to tell someone what happened. Well, by the time they started to look for the guy, he was long gone.

Another was on the eve of moving to a new apartment. I lived in a semi-basement apartment and my phone was disconnected and my landlords were gone to Italy for their vacation. I lived in a furnished apartment and everything was boxed up and ready for when my brother would come in the morning with a friend to move me.

Around 2 in the morning ... someone starts knocking and yelling at my door. "Let me in"... he was obviously drunk... and at the wrong building. I lived in a section that had several duplexes and triplexes and they were basically identical. This guy thought his girlfriend lived here.. and was pounding on my door demanding I let him in. I didn't know what to do.. I kept yelling... "you are at the wrong place!".. but he wasn't listening.. and I was not going to open my door for anything.

Remember now, that my phone is no longer in service and this guy can make as much ruckus as he wants because my landlords are away. I start shoving boxes of heavy books toward the door.. piling stuff up to make sure he can't get in.... for a moment I think he is gone.. but then the pounding starts again.. at my the windows.. he's banging on them.. yelling.. "let me in!" I cried and I trembled and sat in a corner with my arms hugging my knees until he eventually left. You'd have thought that a neighbor would have called the police but no.. nobody wanted to get involved.

A friend of mine, Dan, goes out in the city at night and takes photographs in not so friendly places. He's taken shots at night at railway tracks as well as in the alley behind a seedy bar. He gets some pretty great shots. I would never do that.. not alone. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a guy and just go where you want, when you want to and not be intimidated by anyone.